Life Is Back To Normal~Finally!

After 3 days of David being home, our life is finally back to normal! On Saturday we went to O'Charley's for lunch and then went to the movies to see a very awesome movie-Transformers Revenge of the Fallen...this movie ROCKED!

On Sunday we slept in and then went to visit David's father, ran to Home Depot, and came home to relax and watch the Nascar race. The simple things that we had forgotten about while David was gone are all that are important to us now. Spending time as a family together and just enjoying each other, it's amazing and something I no longer take for granted.

David goes back to work tomorrow and this weekend we're going to my mom's house in Wilmington, NC for 4th of July. We'll spend time at the beach and who knows what else...as long as we're together, that's all that matters! Life back to normal is pure bliss!

A Little Bit Of Heaven

Yesterday the long wait was finally over and David came home to us! I think I was ready from the moment I woke up yesterday morning because it was all I thought about every second! We got to the airport early and waited and waited for what seemed like forever and then I got a text from David saying "I'm here!" and my heart began to race as if it were the first time I were meeting him or something. The girls held up their "Welcome Home Daddy" poster and waited, and then I saw him from afar and told them Daddy was coming down the walk way. The girls ran to him and hugged their daddy long and hard and it was a moment of relief and joy. Tears started to roll down their little eyes when they realized that daddy was really here and it was amazing! Then it was my turn to finally hold my man and let him know how proud I was of him and how much I've missed him..that moment will stay with me always!

We then went to our hotel and settled in to sleep. As I lay there staring at his face, I memorized every feature as if I were relearning each one and tears began to fall down my face as I thought about how hard this journey had been and how relieved I was to be in his arms again. He looked at me and asked me if I was crying and I said "Yes, because I'm so happy that you're finally home." And he told me that he was happy too and then with a seriousness in his voice he said "I didn't think I would make it out this time." In that moment I was reminded of how difficult this journey had been for him too and that God had been faithful to both of us by finally bringing us back together, right where we belong!

Distance kept David and I apart for so long, but distance helped our love grow stronger than it already was and I won't ever take David for granted again. He's my soul mate, the love of my life, and my everything. Being with David again after so many months was a little bit of heaven and I thank God for it all!

No Need To Doubt

I always wonder why we feel like we can't trust God to be the rescuer of our problems and fears? He is big enough to create the entire universe, but not big enough to save us from debt or get us through a tough time in our lives?
I'm no stranger to this feeling...I've been there more times than I can count and despite my doubt, God is constantly reminding me exactly how mighty and faithful he really is! If it were us, we'd be saying "Why should I do anything ever again for someone who never trusts me anyway" or something to that affect. But not God, he is the God of forgiveness and mercy and he never ceases to show his faithfulness in my life.
When David left our family eight months ago to join the Army, I literally was beside myself and felt so alone and hopeless. I didn't think I could ever survive without the one person I had come to depend on more than anyone else in my life. My hopes were trampled several times throughout this journey and my faith in God was being tested on a daily basis. There were days where I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel and I was hanging on by a thread. But even in those dark moments, there was always a constant in my life~God! He never left my side through all of this and he knew that no matter how tough times got, I was strong enough to make it through, even when I didn't believe that myself.
Eight months ago my life was turned upside down, but tomorrow my life will finally return to normal and I can breathe a huge sigh of relief because God has been faithful to me yet again and is bringing my husband home where he belongs! Our family will finally be a family again and there aren't any words to describe that feeling. The past eight months have been hard. It's been a difficult journey, but a journey that has taught me more about myself than I ever could have imagined! God has taught me how to depend on myself, be patient, respect my husband, love my girls a little harder, believe in myself and above all~never doubt God's faithfulness in my life because he is always true to his word and big enough to carry me through any size journey!

New Glasses

I got some new glasses and thought I'd share my librarian look, LOL!

Anticipation Has Arrived!

The England household has been filled with anticipation lately as it gets closer and closer to David coming home from the Army! David still has to pass one more p/t test in order to graduate and come home this Saturday, but I have layed that burden at God's feet and I am trusting the Lord to carry David through it.

We are preparing for him to come home on time and have been very busy the past week. I am in "My husband is coming home after eight months and I need to have my house spic and span" OCD cleaning mode, LOL! I have to clean the whole house from top to bottom even if David isn't that concerned with it, I just want it to be perfect when he walks through that door! I'm also in "I just lost eighty-two pounds and I need to make sure I look HOT when my man comes home" mode! I'm going to get my hair done on Wednesday, a pedi on Friday and my eyebrows waxed on Friday just to look as good as I can possibly get, LOL! I just can't wait to see my husband! I LOVE him more than anything and being away from him for this long has been hard on my heart. He's my best friend and my soul mate and the distance has only proved how strong our love for eachother truly is.

The girls are so EXCITED for their daddy to come home as well! They spent this past weekend painting Father's Day cards for him and making him a "Welcome Home" poster to bring to the airport. I'm so proud of them for being strong while their daddy has been gone! This journey has been long and difficult at times, but God has taught us all so much throughout and he has never left our side. I pray that this journey has now come to an end and we will embark on a new journey together as a family all the while looking back and thanking God for what he has taught us with no regrets, for he has a reason for it all!

He Is Enough

My dear friend Kristy let me borrow a book called "Do you think I'm beautiful?" by Angela Thomas and this is a great book! I'm not done with it yet, but I have already learned so much from it!

I never really put too much thought into it until I starting reading this book, but I have been like most women I'm sure, who are always trying to fill their lives with things only to realize that nothing will ever fill up their hearts completely, but God will!
I'm a stay at home mother and I absoultely love my job even though it can bring frustration, tears, hard times, and moments of wanting to give up. I know that through the midst of all the negative, the positive far outweighs it all! My girls are nine and six years old and in the past I have felt like because they are growing up, it's time to have another child so that I can constantly feel needed by someone. I failed to see that I am just trying to fill my heart with something to love but God is the only one who will ever fill that void. Not more stuff, not another baby, not a new car, not a new house...just God! Without Him in my life, I will never be completely full. And that presence cannot just simply be a presence, it must be an intimate, personal relationship with God. I don't know about you, but I'm tired of searching and searching for things to fill up my heart and soul only to still feel that hole...I choose God, I choose a personal intimate relationship with my Father, I choose to give it all to him and lay it at His feet. I don't want to feel emty anymore!

My prayer today is
Dear God,
Fill my heart and soul with your presence and your never ending love. Make me constantly aware that only YOU can make me whole and allow me to become more intimate and personal with YOU every single day because only then will I ever be completely whole!
~Amen

Lead Me Back To You

The church we were attending closed a few months ago and since then, I haven't really been to church because I wanted to wait for David to come home so we could find a new church home together. I've noticed that when I'm not involved in church, my relationship with God seems to go on the back burner and it's not something I do on purpose, it just seems to end up that way. It's something that I want desperately to resolve because no matter if I'm attending church or not, God always needs to be the center of my life! I am looking forward to David coming home though, so we can find a new church home and get plugged back in with fellow Christ followers and delve into the word a little more. I really do feel like my life doesn't go as smoothly when God is not the center of it and it's something I'm going to work on.

Today my prayer is "God lead me back to you, back to your heart, back to your spirit, where I belong."

Resentment Be Gone!

Many of you know that my husband David has been gone in the Army for eight months now and what a journey it has been for the both of us. While I am very proud of David for what he has accomplished and how hard he has worked to get through this, there has been a part of me that has been full of resentment towards David for choosing to make such a drastic decision that not only has affected me, but also my children. I haven't voiced this resentment to David too many times because the last thing I want to do is discourage him, but I have voiced it out of anger and I needed to step back and see the error of my ways!

This decision to join the Army was not supported by me, but it's something David wanted to do to try and better our lives and once he signed the papers, there was nothing I could do anyway...he belonged to the THEM! So, I did what I had to do, I had no choice. When David first left, I wanted to throw myself the biggest pity party in the universe and I did! I honestly didn't think I could make it without him. We've never been apart and being without him scared me stiff! I had to put on a dignified face and go through every passing day for my children even if I was crying on the inside.

The lonliness I have experienced from being without my husband for eight long months can only be described as heartache. It's been tough going through every day life and events without the one person in my life that means everything to me. He's missed birthdays, anniversaries, surgeries, holidays, school events, and moments we can't get back. I've missed his company, his touch, his laughter, his smile, his humor, his eyes, his support, his encouragement, his love...I've just missed HIM!

I've had to be both mom and dad for our two girls and I'm not sure that I've done such a great job, but I know I've done the best that I can and I know my girls have been provided for and taken care of, so I can rest in that knowledge. They've missed their daddy more than words can say and sometimes they've acted out because of it, they've cried because of it, but I know that above all, they're just as proud of their daddy as I am!

As the end of this long journey draws near and I have time to ponder every aspect of this journey, I know there is only one thing left to do....finally let go of the resentment and be the supportive wife that I know my husband deserves, for this journey hasn't been easy for either one of us and just as I have had to trudge through muddy waters, David has had to walk through fire and step into a whole new world all for the sake of bettering our lives, so who am I to resent him? It's time for me to forgive and let go and look forward to our future together.
That's exactly what I intend to do for the love of my life~he deserves that from me!

Request Granted

I haven't blogged about my personal life in some time now because it got to be too much and I needed a break from it. But today, a dear friend had a request and I decided to grant her request because she speaks from the heart and I admire her opinion dearly. So Kristy, this blog is inspired by you for your faith in me!

I intend on blogging about every day things that occur in my life and hopefully using the gift that God has given me to inspire someone else. This will be the view through Caley's window!